5 Reasons Why Carrie Bradshaw is a Chuffing Idiot

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Every now and then you read a blog post that’s so utterly brilliant you have to praise it, and then immediately decide to steal the idea. Jenn from Photo-Jenn recently wrote a post entitled My Love-Hate Relationship with Sex and the City where she details every single reason why Carrie Bradshaw is a bloody moron in the first Sex and the City film. I wholeheartedly agreed with every point and it reminded me of all the other reasons I have for hating Carrie.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I love Sex and the City. I have most of the series’ on DVD and re-watch them regularly. Interestingly, when I first watched all of the episodes when I was about 15/16 I actually really liked Carrie. In a discussion with a friend, we even decided that I was ‘the Carrie’ of our group. At the time, I was really pleased with this; now I realised that it was my friend’s way of saying “You’re a massive bellend”.

In this post I will document all of the main things that annoy me about Carrie Bradshaw.

Carrie 41. How She Is An Awful Friend

Carrie Bradshaw is first and foremost a truly terrible friend. You might not notice this on first watching, but you start to notice that every single scene where Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte have bothered to join this little idiot for brunch or cocktails revolves around Carrie’s drama of the day (which is usually stupid). Whenever any of the others try to talk about any of their life problems – which include divorce, pregnancy, cheating and, y’know, CANCER – Carrie always manages to dive in with one of her quips and bring it back round to her. If she was my friends I would definitely lose my temper and ram my brioche down her throat.

Also, do not get me started on the episode where she falls out with Charlotte because Charlotte won’t lend her an insane amount of money to make up for her years of being a financial disaster. Piss off Carrie, whack your shoes on eBay and stop being such a bitch.

Carrie 32. How She Keeps Going Back to Big

Putting my personal dislike of Big aside (what are we meant to find attractive about him exactly?) I think Carrie and Big can singlehandedly be blamed for a whole generation of women constantly going back to damaging relationships and horrible exes. The decision to have them ultimately end up together was a terrible one. All it told us was ‘oh, you know that man that’s quite mean to you and never commits and makes you cry and picks you up and drops you again and gets married to someone who isn’t you and then cheats on that person with you and causes you to cheat on your boyfriend too and then doesn’t even want to marry you and obviously just hates your effing guts? Yeah, just stick with that – because it will all work out in the end!’

Just… no. Where is the logic, writers. Where is the humanity.

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3. How She Treats Lovely Aidan

In conjunction with the above point, one of the things that makes Carrie Bradshaw a huge chuffing idiot is how horrible she is to Lovely Aidan. Lovely Aidan, with his dog and his leather jackets and his sander and chisel… He is the perfect human man, and what does she do? She fucks him over completely. Loads. First she cheats on him with Big – which I cannot even comprehend – and then vigorously pursues him to get him back. Even though he makes it quite clear how emotionally damaged she left him (I defy you to not sob at the “YOU BROKE MY HEART!” scene), she decides to still force her way back into his life and treat him as a plaything.

After being a pissy bitch for ages over the fact that he is not 100% over the affair, and screaming “You have to forgive me!” at least thirty times in one scene (reality check Carrie you harlot: he doesn’t), she then actually decides, once he’s forgiven her and been lovely and proposed, that actually she can’t even be arsed to wear the ring properly, or have to spend any time with him, or be nice to him.

She also thinks it’s perfectly reasonable to stay friends with Big. Who she CHEATED on Aidan with. Which brings me on to my point I feel most vehemently about:

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This is an absolutely atrocious Carrie moment in the long string of atrocious Carrie moments that essentially makes up the entire franchise that is Sex and the City. Aiden has been nice enough to take her back, forgive her affair, tolerate her friendship with fellow-affairee, AND bring her for a lovely little break in his cabin. She spends the whole trip being, unsurprisingly, a mammoth bitch – mainly because there are squirrels. She then has the audacity to invite Big to the cabin. To Aidan’s cabin. To hang out and drink wine.


Carrie 55. How She Thinks She’s A Wild Horse

For those of you who are lucky enough to be unfamiliar with this scene, Carrie has ended up outside the engagement party of Big and his new fiance, who he actually likes. Rather than taking this as the clear sign it is that she’s a crap person, she instead manages to delude herself that the reason she’s single is because she’s too fabulous. This is because she’s wild, like a horse. She shares this terrible moment with a proper mental horse who starts kicking off on the street and probably ended up being made into glue. I wish Carrie could meet this same fate.

What do you all think of Sex and the City’s leading lady idiot?

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